I had a small epiphany over the weekend. I had put up a video on LinkedIn. My third video. Apparently if you are running your own business and want to build your profile you must be doing videos on a regular consistent basis. Who says? Plenty of trainers on the business course I am currently undertaking, peers, other people in business, and the list goes on.
Reaction was swift to each video – “you are too serious, you are too close to the camera, you are too far away from the camera, you are not expressive enough” and on it went. I knew I was not conveying the passion I have for the subject matter because I was so uncomfortable.
At this point a sort of rage filled me. Did they have any idea how horribly painful I found the whole experience? No, of course not, it wasn’t their fault. They were providing me with constructive feedback. The problem lay with my own lack of awareness. I hated it. Of course, I couldn’t be myself. I found the whole experience excruciating. I have no problem with online Zoom meetings or webinars, but trying to get a video message across naturally, when it is something I really want to convey seems to be beyond me!
Following that, I had a conversation with myself that went something like this:
Older Wiser Me: You know you don’t actually have to do this to yourself.
Me: But I do, I have to keep up with everyone else.
Older Wiser Me: What about your writing? I notice you haven’t done a blog post lately. I thought that was your preferred mode of communication – you know, providing quality content.
Me: Hmmm (thinks for a bit) yes, I suppose it was, but you know, I have to do this video malarkey now.
Older Wiser Me: Why? You hate it and I hate to tell you, but it comes across. You are as stiff as a plank of wood.
Me: Thanks for that. Well, wouldn’t I be missing out on potential clients without it?
Older Wiser Me: Well, are you gaining any new ones by doing it? (laughs maniacally)
Me: I hate to admit it, but you are right. Bloody hell. I don’t have to do this. I am better with words. The clients I want to attract will take the time to read good quality content.
Older Wiser Me: Well, you better up your game then, because I don’t think you are going to attract them based on this blog post.
Me: Oh…b***er off!
Following that riveting exchange, I have followed my older wiser self’s advice by going back to my core strengths.
I am targeting leaders, managers and those in organisations who wish to develop their self-awareness and their leadership qualities. They take time to read good quality content. They don’t skim. If I don’t produce the quality, they won’t read it. That’s my yard stick.
So, I can stop wasting painful hours trying to be something I’m not and I can stop doing something I hate, and I can get back to my passion – providing good quality written content in the field of Emotional Intelligence, Executive coaching and leadership.
You can breathe a sigh of relief – no more woeful videos from me! My passion lies in writing words and learning – I’m off to research my next article!
What I have learned from this experience is that you persevere when it’s worth persevering, but ensure that what you are doing is in line with your core strengths, your values and your Why? Therein lies the answer.
P.S. If you have read this far, I applaud you (seriously you must have too much time on your hands – no just kidding.) I promise higher content value from here on in. I just had to get this off my chest. Thank you for reading – I feel so much better now!